There Is Never Enough Time
Since the death of a cherished friend, I’ve been pondering an insight shared by a treasured mentor years ago…“there is never enough time, Luann,” he wisely stated. Back then, I was a young mother with a health concern, fearing what would happen to my kids if things went south. “It doesn’t matter whether you’re young, old, or somewhere in between,” he mused, “most of us want to stick around. And since we can’t really know when our time is up, hadn’t we better make good use of the moments we have while we’re here? What good does worrying about the future do, when you can’t control it?”
Years later, I heard another zinger from revered poet, David Whyte. “We are creatures of the great-good-bye,” he proclaimed. “…the only living species that can anticipate death.” Yikes. I guess he had a point. So, is there anything we can do assuage our human fear of the inevitable? When will that dreaded grim-reaper raise his ugly head?
With this question in mind as I consider my friend Pat’s courageous participation in his own ultimate exit, I wonder—how did he do it with such dignity and grace? It seemed with unyielding faith, regardless of any hardship he would have had to endure while going through the process. A lifetime of devotion to the Divine repeatedly grounded him in the “peace that passeth all understanding.” Regardless of whatever was happening in his earthly orbit, he somehow knew that all would be well.
Upon hearing the news of his pending death, I, on the other hand, did not in the least believe that “all would be well.” I silently appealed: “Just let me have one more day, or even one more hour with you—please. I thought we would have more time—that we would grow old together. Please don’t go—not yet!” Despite my protestations, Pat quietly slipped away. Miraculously, in the midst of that jarring finality, I remembered the late Bishop Gerber’s golden directive: “If there is never enough time, how can you make better use of the moments you have, now?”
How about dropping all of the petty dramas of life and getting down to what really matters—the business of loving? What if today were my last? Would I have forgiven everyone…would I have forgiven myself? Would I have poured my heart and soul out to the ones I dearly love, repeatedly expressing my gratitude for who they are and the gifts they bring to me and to the world? Would I have recognized that everyone of us humans have clay feet and with that infirmity we are simply doing what we do—the good, the bad, and the ugly, given the encumbrance of our abnormalities? Would I have cultivated the art of tolerance for others—for myself? Would I have let go of the need for perfection in my relationships and just let people be, realizing if things aren’t going my way, I can either step aside, or change my attitude rather than expecting someone else to change theirs?
“Death is not a morbid thought. It is the greatest teacher in all of life.” –Michael Singer
I treasure the many conversations I had with Pat about life, death, and the Divine hand guiding it all. Often, we spoke of meaningful coincidences and what causes those to happen. We both concluded that these seeming “random flukes” are not just happenstance. Rather instead, isn’t it possible that there is a mighty Force ever available to take the wheel of our life-ship, repeatedly steering us safely through the storm and into the port of our best destiny? And, if so, shouldn’t our primary task be just to pay attention so we can be available to get the directive?
Sometimes we do. Sometimes we don’t. I was extremely grateful that on the day Pat died, I’d listened to the inner message which guided me to reach out. Therefore, he and I, being among the “creatures of the great-good bye,” had the privilege of bidding our adieus. It was a great honor to be among those with whom he had a final chat.
“We all come from the One and we all return to the One.”—Ana Perez-Chisti
I have no doubt that Pat is now in a position to understand the mysterious synchronicities available to guide us—which, of course, can never be explained in secular terms. No. It would seem that you’d have to be a person of great faith, such as he was, to get the memo.
A deeply devoted father, grandfather, brother, and friend, Pat was a soulful man, with a direct connection to the Divine love which supported him in overcoming obstacles—particularly the physical challenges he would endure while transitioning from this life-form into the next. I will forever be grateful for his courageous example on how to live life with unwavering faith and fortitude. He was an utterly exceptional human.
After his final good-bye, I received a message from a mutual acquaintance noting that for him, Pat’s death was “…exhibit A for bad things happening to the finest of souls.” I am absolutely certain that Pat would most definitely not have seen things that way. Instead, he would have just simply accepted that it was his time, and from what I can gather, he did just that with a gentlemanly grace that was completely unique to him and his character.
Yes, he was most definitely “the finest of souls”—a treasured father, grandfather, brother, and friend, who I have no doubt is soaring in the heavens, grateful for a life well-lived and all of those who accompanied him on the journey.
I love you, Pat—always will. Thank you for making such an incredible difference in my life, and for mentoring me in facing the inevitable with my own faith and fortitude. You showed me how to drop my fear of the unknown by trusting Life on Life’s terms—surrendering my preferences to Divine will—just like you always did—until you drew your last breath. You will remain in my heart forever and I know there to be a multitude of others who join me in that sentiment.
Now then…considering those hearts of ours, shall we get on with that “business of loving” thing? While we’re at it, maybe those meaningful coincidences will become more obvious. Speaking of, stay tuned for my new book with which Pat was intimately involved. The plan is for it to be published just before Christmas—fingers crossed ☺.
A Handbook for Mastering the Science and Soul of Happiness:
Recognizing Meaningful Coincidences and Angelic Encounters
In closing I will leave you with one of my favorite quotes:
“There are only two ways to live your life: As though nothing is a miracle, or everything is a miracle.”—Albert Einstein
I’m pretty certain I’ll be havin’ some “angelic encounters” in the foreseeable future to boost my belief in those miracles. How ‘bout you?
With so much love,
October 25, 2023